525,600 minutes

 

This video shows a sad day in Arkansas as a brightly-clad crowd stood on the steps of the Arkansas Capitol Building belting out "Seasons of Love" in protest of a new proposed bill.

Senate Bill 43l in (and I regrettably say this at the moment) my home state wants to limit what they are calling "drag" performances, putting them in the same category as strip clubs and putting many restrictions on places that hold these performances. They cannot be within 1,000 feet of schools, churches, etc, and prohibits them from public property. It would also prohibit those under 18 from watching. The incredibly vague definition of drag performances in the bill keeps throwing around the term "prurient interest," which I would love to pretend I did not have to Google...but I did. Apparently, it means "having or encouraging an excessive interest in sexual matters." So there you go. 

I read in another article that, somehow I suppose in an attempt to "make it better" ( cue eye roll) suggests it does not apply to every circumstance where someone would dress as another gender, again citing the word "prurient" and just adding another vague layer to the onion.  Its main goal, as supporters of the bill say, is to "protect our children." Well, let's not worry about issues like the gaps in public education, teacher shortages, mental illness, or rural poverty. That doesn't affect our kids nearly as much as seeing a drag queen. Give me a break. 

My mother teaches theatre at a college that prides itself in having theatre productions that can be enjoyed by those of all ages. She has directed productions like Charlie's Aunt, and I myself was in Servant to Two Masters where I played a woman who disguises herself as a man. And, lest we forget,  1/5 of Shakespeare's surviving 38ish plays involve cross-dressing in some way. He was not the only one, though. English Renaissance, Greek, and Japanese theatre along with Chinese Opera all had these practices, which mostly stemmed from the belief that women should not be allowed on stage.  Then there are the musicals of today...Kinky Boots, Priscilla Queen of the Dessert...which most of us theatergoers will be sad and angered to see canceled simply because some people cannot handle all of the fabulosity. If people do not do enough research before going to the theatre to see if it is a family show or not, that is on them. "Prurient" does not just apply to the theatre of today either, plenty of classic theatre contains innuendos, but I am sure that those that dreamed up this bill would not be able to catch it. 

The less "fabulous" non-allies act like drag is a new thing. In one article I read, yet another wealthy white male [shocker] was quoted as saying "Children are being exposed today to things that 30, 40, 50, years ago, we couldn't even imagine." So, again, I took to Google. The first person to actually call themselves a "queen of drag" was William Dorsey Swann in the 1800s. He was jailed for, among other things, holding a drag ball. The modern-day queen of drag in most people's opinions, RuPaul Charles, has had a mainstream drag competition show called RuPaul's Drag Race on television for about 14 years, which has won him numerous Emmys. RuPaul first appeared on the American Music Show 41 years ago and hit the mainstream media 34 years ago when he was in a music video for "Loveshack" by the B-52s.  And, of course, I would be remiss to not mention the famous line in one of my favorite childhood movies..."What do you want to do, dress in drag and do the hula?"

I guess I should have started this with "Some older white men have ignored issues that should actually be addressed and turned their attention to, yet again, vaguely limiting a group of people just because they are different."  Which, to be honest, our country has a solid history of limiting or taking away rights from people just because they are different. I think the real question is not what is drag...what is performance....who does this apply to...but WHY CAN'T WE JUST LEAVE EACH OTHER ALONE?!?! I am sure that the people for this bill would not be happy with someone coming in and trying to limit where and when they could play golf...and they don't even make money doing that! Most drag performances I have seen advertised take place in bars and clubs, where children should not be anyway. And as far as events like Drag Queen story time for kids, there is nothing "prurient" about those, though I'm sure some will try and make it that way.  Megan Tullock of NWA Equality said it very well, "“I think that the legislature is trying to hold drag to a special standard, making it be only prurient. And prurience is really in the eye of the beholder."  Does anyone remember Elvis?

I guess, to sum up my rant, I will just point out one other thing someone told me they heard in reaction to this bill...if you don't want to watch a drag performance, just don't watch one! Seems like a pretty simple solution. And I hope as we move forward we can all remember the words of the great RuPaul:

 "We're all born naked and the rest is Drag."

Taming of the Shrew

She stood there, panting and taking turns eyeballing each of the four of us. She had never been away from her home, her safe place, and now she was five hours away staring at four brand new faces in a brand new barn as we just stared back. The look in her eyes read of fear with not a glimpse of trust to be found. Yet. 
She didn’t trust any of us as far as she could throw us, and at a year old and around 1000 pounds, she could’ve thrown any of us pretty far if she so desired. Two attempts got her off of the trailer with no injuries to anyone, but it was certainly the journey getting her to her pen. She breathed heavy and plastered herself against the barn wall, where she adamantly stayed any time one of us tried to approach her. Getting too close to her was met with a bolt in the other direction.  If she could have climbed the panels of her pen, she would have.  We all knew she wasn’t crazy, but she wasn’t going to just be one you walked in there and started petting.  Lately we had an easy time breaking heifers to the point of being show ready...the girls on our show string had taken to the life quickly.  We knew this new addition was far good enough to be there with them, we loved her already and wanted others to see her as well. 
For some reason still unknown to me, she took to me. Maybe it was my determination to make her trust me, or maybe it was because I was the lady with the feed. Either way, we all started a journey with our new heifer. It was a slow pace, set by her.  Some people would say that she had an “attitude” , that she just needed a firm hand. But I knew...we all knew...that she was just going to take some time. She just needed some patience. And a little more walking forward instead of going in reverse. Little steps. Picking up the halter. A few steps. Brushing and petting. A few more steps. Leading to the edge of the pen. A few more steps. Leading to water. A few more steps. A bath. A few more steps. Clipping. A few more steps. Her debut and a test of trust. And finally, with a little more work, a flawless showering appearance.
I myself have not worked this closely with a show heifer in a while, but I also feel very connected to her.  Proud doesn’t even begin to cover how I feel about how far she has come. I would love to brag on my family’s domestication skills, but it was mostly her.  I am a person that likes to have some sense of control in situations, but we all had to relinquish most of the control of this relationship to her. It has been a different experience for sure, and a learning one all the way around.
She is our Cora.

Here's To Strong Women

There is currently a post ciruculating around the agriculture community on Facebook, some of which I am a frequent browser of. It reads:

To the women raising cattle for butcher, but cuddling a wet, struggling newborn calf, that’s covered in afterbirth, inside their pickup truck.

To the women who believe in God and the word, but also believe that everyone has a right to love who they want.

To the women who aren’t trying to prove they can do anything a man can do, but genuinely enjoy pushing themselves to conquer any challenge.

To the women with broken and chipped nails, but still have painted on red polish.

To the women giving immunizations and administering medicine, but still believe in the healing powers of stones and plants.

To the women always dressing up for the occasion, wearing yesterday’s curls, blue jeans, and the heels of cowboy boots.

To the women busting their knuckles and callusing their palms, but still wearing their diamon wedding bands and turquoise jewels.

To the women who want to be in the church pew, but there is work to be done and know God can be worshipped on the back of a horse.

No labels. No boxes. No judgements.

May we know these kind of women. May we be these kind of women. May we raise these kind of women.
- Jordan Johnson 

Every time I read this post, I appreciate it even more, and not just because of the message behind it. It is so simple yet so perfect at describing women in the agriculture industry, a place where strong women both flourish and sometimes go unnoticed.  Women who are passionate about both love and work,  because we know both on the farm and in life, those things go hand in hand. I was raised by these types of women. I am blessed to call these types of women my family and friends, and proud to say I have them in my corner. I see the influence of these types of women every day, whether they are still with us or have gone on across The Divide. I more than "know" these women, and I am better off for it. I strive not only to be this type of woman every day, in all aspects of my life, but to encourage young ladies to be this type of woman. The world needs more of them and, maybe some day, I will raise my own

What We Do in the Shadows

I rewatched an old episode of Rizzoli & Isles last night. In it, the daughter of a Senator is raped at a conference by a family friend much older than her. She later learns that he, a powerful businessman, has done this to several women and she plans to expose him. She exposes him through secret videos, but not before being murdered for her efforts, which of course has to happen because it is a homicide detective show.

The fear and anguish of living with sexual assault is all too real to many people, even some I am close to and care about. Sexual assault has recently seen a lot of coverage in the media, and victims are getting both praise and flack for their efforts. There are even some instances where the victims are being questioned on the validity of their statements and their ability to tell the truth.
Why are they just now coming forward?
It's hard to believe that someone got away with assaulting that many women/men.
Why didn't they press charges?
They're still holding on to that?

Having never been through an event like that myself, I can only offer secondhand insight. I have people in my life who have been through these situations, and I can give what I see through their struggles and other instances I have heard about.

Why are they just now coming forward? As I stated before, the fear of these types of situations is a very real thing. The situation is even more difficult when the assailant is a person that the victim sees as someone to be trusted or respected. In a lot of these instances, victims are assaulted by someone in an authority position or by a family member or friend. According to the Bureau of Justice Statistics, of sexual abuse cases reported to law enforcement, 93% of juvenile victims knew the perpetrator. Also according to them, in jail or prison, 60% of all sexual violence against inmates is perpetrated by the institution’s staff.
Sometimes, the victims are threatened or mentally abused to keep them from coming forward. In some instances, they may not come forward for fear that their relationships with family, friends, or significant others may be ruined. They may be afraid they will be looked at differently or, plainly and simply, they might live in fear that people will not believe them, or look at them as if part of it is their fault. Why would they think something like that?

It's hard to believe that someone got away with assaulting that many women/men. It may be hard to believe but believe it. It happens every day. On average, there are 321,500 victims (age 12 or older) of rape and sexual assault each year in the United States. I try to think about it in simple(ish) terms. Say a little boy or girl has a serious sweet tooth. He/She takes a cookie from a cookie jar, unseen and unbeknownst to anyone. He/she does not get in trouble or get scolded. So, being a child with dessert temptation control problems, he/she takes another one after their next meal. If no one ever knows about them stealing cookies out of the cookie jar, and they never get in trouble, then why stop? If there are no consequences (internal or external), then the actions are set on a path to continue. This would be especially true if the victim knows their assailant. They already have a hand up on the victim, because they can play to their personal knowledge or their authoritative position. If this works once and there are no immediate consequences, they see no reason to stop.

Why didn't they press charges? This is a question even I have asked myself about people I know who have been through sexual assault situations. However, I have discovered that, in the simplest explanation, sometimes it is just too much. Pressing charges would mean reliving a traumatic experience over again, probably more than once. It also means possibly facing the person who violated them, along with lawyers and a lot of other people asking detailed questions about what is quite possibly the worst day of that person's life. Applause and admiration to those that can go through that process, because they provide a voice for not only them but those that were not in the mental or personal state to do so. Pressing charges is a way to show the public what the assailant has done and to get some form of justice for their actions, but some never get to the point that their mental state can handle that. Many just want it to go away, and many even fear regression from the progress they have made.

They're still holding on to that? Short answer: Yes. Healing is different for everyone. Sexual assault/rape is a mentally scarring experience, to say the least. Moving on and coping is a long, step-by-step process with no timeline.  The focus should be on the healing, not how long it is taking. The mental state of anyone is a fragile thing. Here are some more statistics from the Bureau of Justice Statistics for everyone to keep in mind.
-94% of women who are raped experience symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) during the two weeks following the rape.
-30% of women report symptoms of PTSD 9 months after the rape.
-33% of women who are raped contemplate suicide.
-13% of women who are raped attempt suicide.-Approximately 70% of rape or sexual assault victims experience moderate to severe distress, a larger percentage than for any other violent crime. The survivors of these crimes are strong and persistent, no matter where they are in their healing process. They live every day with a life-changing traumatic memory, and many just grasp for some sense of normalcy. 

Another sad occurrence is that, because of privacy and protection laws, these monsters can go on living regular day-to-day lives and have jobs around the public where no one is the wiser. For example, if they lose their job (authority figure) because of abuse or assault but charges are not formally pressed, their former employer cannot divulge the reasoning for their termination and the individual does not have to divulge that information to any employer looking to hire them. Therefore, they can go on abusing their authoritative position in another job or position until charges are formally filed or someone comes forward to the media/public. Also, if a juvenile assaults another but misses a date for court or appointment to review their case, they may be temporarily allowed to return to an environment around other juveniles and no one-on-one supervision, even though they have committed a sexual crime against another student. Protection and privacy laws are sadly not directed toward the protection of the victims. 

I think that a lot of the speculation put on victims of sexual assault/rape comes from living in a society of questioning things we find improbable. I call it the "I can't believe that happened so it didn't" society. We tend to push away or question traumatic experiences because we do not think things like that could or should happen. Sadly, they do, and most likely more often than any of us know.

Northeast Arkansas Cattle Farm Shocked by Twins

One Northeast Arkansas farm is no stranger to expecting the unexpected, but a recent event is a definite first for the long-time cattle breeders.

Warren, Melinda, and Katie Williams along with Bubba Crouch of WKM Cattle in Imboden were out on a routine check of their cattle when they saw their blue roan Shorthorn cross cow with two bull calves at her side. For many in the cattle business, this is something rare, but not surprising.

"We didn't think they were twins," says Katie Williams, "because they were two completely different colors." One bull calf was a red roan and one was black with white spots.

The family decided one of the calves belonged to another nearby red and white heifer, dated to calve around the same time, and that the blue roan had just taken both as hers.

"It is not uncommon for heifers to act strange their first time calving, and the red roan calf was a little smaller. The [red and white] heifer's bag was not developed and her back end was not loose. We figured she had him a little early and did not recognize that he belonged to her." Williams said.

To take a calf that is not theirs and raise it, especially when they already have one, is a task only the best mother cows take on, and it is extremely rare for first-time calvers.  Therefore, it is a trait that cattle farmers rejoice in seeing. As Williams herself stated, "this cow isn't going anywhere anytime soon." However, the story does not end there.

A few weeks later, the family was getting all their cattle up for pregnancy checks. The red and white heifer they thought had long abandoned her calf looked different, a close-to-calving type of different.

"My dad thought she was just losing weight, but then we got her up. All the signs she was missing with what we thought was her calf she had now."

A few days later, she gave birth to a bull calf. This proved the Williams' had something very rare and very surprising on their farm. It is unlikely that a cow takes both calves in the event of twins, for heifers in particular. Only about one in every 200 births result in twins, and having twins of two completely different colors is even more remarkable.

"This was really a special event," stated Williams, "for a first-calf heifer to have twins, take them both, and for them to look totally different. So, this is really not just a special event, but a special cow. This is a story I will be telling for a long time."

The new mother cow and babies are doing well and flourishing.

Pictured: The first-time mother (SLF Blue Mona)
with her twins, "Mater" and "Doc."